My Bad Sorry

Written by Joey

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Appologies

Written by Joey

Let me start but telling you about the last couple of weeks for me personally.

well i have managed to get to 9th prestige on MW3 and 3 stars on all Angry Bird levels on FaceBook.

No Seriously i have been real busy in work and life, i know i probably should have just logged on and then stood down from the Times, but to be honest i love doing the times and i have missed doing them.

But this is not fair on you lot not having an active Editor is Wrong, So i Promise to you that if you keep me as your Editor, i will produce a min of 4 issues a week, 2 videos and 2 written, if i fail to keep this promise i will stand down and allow your second choice Editor take over.

Thank you for keeping the faith

I seem to have missed a few things

Written by Joey

So This is the edited Highlights as far as i can work out for the past 20 days ish.

- Angel died in hades Backfire.

-Scotty killed Hades

-Swifty killed Scotty

-Something happened

-then Kiwi and Swifty got killed ending spirits of the underworld(i think)

-somone killed TheObserver with 36k killing him then tyler/palace shot 25k at finn killing him all because hugo killed aine and ran to hideout

-Something else happened

-LadyPurr killed 2 doggs, now if i recall he had a few did some gobbing off in chat about detectives, so she jumped in and killed him first.

-loads of Something else's happened

-Should have at least logged on every day to see what happened.

-donshaw started his own family(about time)

-there was this thing that happened, but i missed it

-a campaign to get rid of me happened, so far its been a bit of a fail.

-Cavie took over the family i was in

-Something happened

-I got kicked for inactivity(dont blame them tbh)

-i see Angle and Angie are shooting each other again

-Joey finally logged on and did an issue(about time)

Editors Questions

Written by Joey

Hi JoeyJay Times Editor

If you get a message like this i promise you that anything you tell me is in strictest confidence of the Times ONLY, and will not be used in normal GN game play

Please note, this is a times question and 100% promise it will only be used in the times

JoeyJays Joke of the Day

Written by Joey

Two old retired Female Gangsters, PHX and didi, were outside their nursing home having a smoke, when it started to rain.

PHX pulled out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette, and continued smoking.

didi: "What's that?"

PHX: "A condom."

didi: "Where'd you get it?"

PHX: "You can get them at any chemist"

The next day, didi hobbled into the local chemist and announced to the pharmacist that she wanted to buy a pack of condoms.

The guy looked at her strangely (she was, after all, in her eighties), but politely asked what brand she preferred.

"Doesn't matter," she replied, "as long as it fits on a Camel."

The pharmacist fainted.

Just for fun

Written by Joey

Just for fun

Can you tell me who these 2 are and what TV show there on

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Soccer aid

Written by Joey

Hi all i was sent this befor i got busy, but thought i would keep it in anyway.

hello joey can i ask a request for your next edition, can you say well done to England in winning the soccer aid football match? this site will have more info ( how much they raised, final score etc ) http://www.itv.com/news/2012-05-27/robbie-williams-england-side-win-soccer-aid-match/

gemmas killing

Written by Joey

I was supposed to do somthing about this but it was so long ago now she is probs rank 50 again and its all forgotten about.

Guide to kids Troubles

Written by Joey

Now Both Akasha and myself are GrandParents to 2 great baby's i thought i would give any of you youngsters yet to have kids of there own a guide to how to look after the little fuckers.

So here is Akasha AND Joeys KIDS GUIDE
Some things we've learned from our children over the years...

1. There is no such thing as child-proofing your house.

2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.

3. A 3 year-old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.

4. If you hook a dog lead over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing batman underwear and a superman cape.

5. It is strong enough however to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 by 20 foot room.

6. Baseballs make marks on ceilings.

7. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.

8. When using the ceiling fan as a bat you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit.

9. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

10. The glass in windows (even double glazing) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.

11. When you hear the toilet flush and the words Uh-oh, it's already too late.

12. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

13. A six year old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36 year old man says they can only do it in the movies.

14. A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.

15. If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing Dad's Golf shoe it does not leak-it explodes.

16. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq foot house 4 inches deep.

17. Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four year old.

18. Duplos will not.

19. Play Dough and Microwave should never be used in the same sentence.

20. Super glue is forever.

21. No matter how much Jam you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.

22. Pool filters do not like Jam.

23. VCR's do not eject Jam sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.

24. Black rubbish bags do not make good parachutes.

25. Marbles in Petrol tanks make lots of noise when driving.

26. You probably do not want to know what that odor is.

27. Always look in the oven before you turn it on.

28. Plastic toys do not like ovens.

29. The fire brigade in Plymouth has at least a 5 minute response time.

30. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earth worms dizzy.

31. It will however make cats dizzy.

32. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

33. Quiet does not necessarily mean don't worry.

34. A good sense of humor will get you through most problems in life (unfortunately, mostly in retrospect).

Hush, Hush

Written by Joey

I got sent this and was asked to keep it quiet, so i thought you might like to see it anyway ?

Exposed
SubjectNo Subject
Message
Something for the Times
I killed Swordfish I got bored, and i like pretending I'm harmless
Keep it anonymous though?

Thank You

Written by Joey

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If you have any GN scandal or gossip Or anything you would like to announce in the times, or just have your say then please message me with your news.

The more info you guys give me the more i can write about.

And if you like what you have seen then remember it will only get better so please vote for Joey as your editor

thanks for reading.

and remember we're watching you
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