The Annual GN Times Gift Catalog

Written by Ronaldodonut

With


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fast approaching, I know you guys are scrambling to find those super nice holiday gift ideas. But at the same time, you want to be on your favorite online Gangster game.


Luckily for you, we solved this problem, by creating a catalog of unique gift ideas that everyone will enjoy!

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Demeter Fragrances

A very nice novelty gift, a perfume with a very unique smell. They have it all, from the smell of a fresh new book to fresh winter snow. Make yourself, or a loved one smell great today.

http://www.demeterfragrance.com/


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Miracle Fruit Berry Tablets

Another cool gift. They're little tablets that dissolve on your tongue and make your tastebuds all weird. Sour things taste sweet, and sweet things taste even sweeter. I've personally tried this myself, and I can vouch that it works. However the experience may differ from person to person

http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/ab3f/


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Wawabot water bottles


Create your own eco friendly water bottle today. Great gift idea in that you can customize each bottle with all sorts of designs, as well as add your own picture to the bottle! Great gift idea for the kids, and for those who are young at heart.

http://www.wawabots.com/


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KGB disappearing ink pen


Your very own, disappearing ink pen! Very cool gift idea, and it works. Featuring real KGB technology, this pen will write like a normal pen, but the messages it writes will disappear within minutes. Although the website says within 48 hours, it usually doesn't take that long.

http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/bf21/


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Ghost Pepper Chili Flakes


A very hot gift idea. Let your loved one know that you care by giving something that they'll never forget. (once they eat it of course)

http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/e8fe/?srp=1


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The Mighty Wallet


A super strong wallet that is tear and water proof, while being extremely long lasting. They're eco friendly, and available in many cool designs. (I have the newspaper styled wallet myself)

http://www.mightywallets.com/


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Canned Unicorn Meat


It doesn't really do much, but it's a great gag gift to give to a friend. Inside of the real metal can is a chopped up plush unicorn, great for those who want... a chopped up plush unicorn.

http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/e5a7/


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Breaking Bad - Complete First Season


A FANTASTIC gift idea for those who haven't watched the show yet. Trust me, they will really be saying thank you after watching this.

http://www.amazon.com/Breaking-Bad-Complete-First-Season/dp/B001DJLCRC


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SleepPhone Headphones


Great gift idea for those sleepy individuals who also like to listen to their music. They're headphones built into a comfortable headband that will work with most music players.

http://www.sleepphones.com/


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Bodum Frykat Portable Charcoal Grill


Perfect for outdoor enthusiasts or those who just love to grill. Cheap, portable grill that will certainly make any yearly camping trip a whole lot more fun.

http://www.amazon.com/Bodum-Fyrkat-13-4-Inch-Portable-Charcoal/dp/B003CM1D4A


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The OCD Chef Cutting Board


And for those who enjoy cooking indoors, there is also the obsessive chef cutting board. Filled with extremely accurate measurements, it's for perfect for professional or amateur chefs who want to get their food just right.

http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/e7a8/


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Flat Life Light

A picture of a lamp that lights up. Need I say more?

http://shop.thefutureperfect.com/lighting/flat-life-light.html


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Gold Playing Cards


Perfect for those who like to indulge in card games, especially those involving money. If you lose, at least you can go down in style.

http://shop.thefutureperfect.com/gift/0-50/gold-playing-cards.html


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7 year pen


Believe it or not, these pens can write for up to 7 years! Inside each pen is a jumbo ink cartridge that is much larger than any regular pen's. (Including the KGB one)

https://www.seltzergoods.com/the-seven-year-pen-c-21.html


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World's largest coffee cup


Sometimes one cup just isn't enough for those tough mornings. This cup can hold up to 20 regular cups of coffee. Damn, that's a lot.

http://www.thinkgeek.com/product/ec57/


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Superman bath robe


Perfect for exquisite gentlemen.

http://www.gentsupplyco.com/Superman-Bathrobe


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For those who like to shop online while saving money, check out the Honey google chrome extension! Honey will search for all available coupon codes upon checkout, and implement them to save you money!

http://joinhoney.com/



And no, I didn't forget. Happy Hanukkah and Kwanzaa for those who celebrate those holidays!

An interview with a true rap mastermind

Written by Ronaldodonut

Recently, our administator Mike have bursted onto the rap scene, taking the music world into a frenzy. We have an exclusive interview right here for you to read.

Bolded responses are Mike's.


Mike.

Ron.

Mike, your rap career is captivating the world. Where did you get all this talent?

Well I grew up in a pretty rough area and still actually live in that same area now. It's tough out here, I'll tell ya that. There are only two ways out: drugs or the rap scene. I choose to let my anger and frustration out through rapping, it really helps me express myself, yano? I kick back down at St. Andrews most evenings and partake in the rap battles down there, it's magic.

Magic, my favorite word.

But tell me, when and where did you get your big break? I know there are a lot of talented individuals out there, how did you get discovered


Yano man, I don't like to blow myself up, I'm not one to blow my own trumpet if you get my drift. So yeah I've had my big break but I still kick it with my crew in my home town, I ain't gonna change, mo' money mo' problems brother. I'd have to say it was when my boy Jerome sent my tape down to the produces at KR Records, I got my first deal and that was that, next thing the radio is bumpin' my tracks and I got millions followin' me on Twitter yo, this stuff is crazy mayn. I'm blessed; I'm lovin' it.

But keep it to me straight Mike.

Why are you in the rap game? The love the game, or the love of the money?

Two buttons. One button, you get no money but you get to continue your rap game.

The other button, you get 1 billion dollars, but you have to give up the rap.

Which button you gonna press?


Man I love the rap game, some people say don't be hatin' on the player, hate the game. Yano I'm a free spirit though man and I move and flow through these people like it ain't nothin' my man so if someone steps on my toe I'm gonna move on. It ain't the game that's wrong it's certain people who don't want to play the game by the rules, you feel me?

I don't need no money, I've made enough money to keep me and my team going for life though man. I had no money before I blew up and I was happy then so why would a guy like me need money now? I don't need that, it's a blessing to have it but I'm in the game for life, I love rap man. I be pressin' that first button my man, no stacks here! I can go without that smelly cheddar cheese yo.

Cure cancer and aids, or have everyone receive a CD with all of your published raps?

What would you rather have?

Man I ain't into that science crap man. I'd have to go with passin' round my tape to every folk in this lovely world we live in, legalise the ganja everywhere and let everybody live on happily. Who needs medicine when we got that natural herb out there to ease the pain, you feel me? Coupled with music from any rap artist who can put words to paper, bring the paper to life, then we blessed man, we blessed.

Here's the really hard question now Mike.

If you had to give up the rap game, or give up love, what would you give up?


Damn man you bustin' my balls right here now my brother. That's not happening here you see cause rap is love and love is rap, you get rid of one you get rid of both, I'm sensin' a trick question boss! I'd have to say get rid of love, get rid of love and the rap will forever return the love to our mind, souls and spirits.

I see, I see. Very insightful. I did not expect this from you Mike. But Mike, here's the question all of GN wants to hear.

Besides yourself, who is the best rapper of all time?

Biggie Smalls, no doubt man, no doubt. He's the king of rap, the king of Brooklyn. Rest in piece BIG.

Big love for Mr. Smalls I see.

Tell me Mike, keep it real.

If you had a choice to destroy Gangster Nation to revive the life of Biggie Smalls, would you do it?

My man! I would do that without a second thought.

So not that much love for the Gangster Nation I see

It's aight though, I feel you. But Mike, I know you got bars and rhymes, but what about jokes? Got a joke you want to say?


Yeah man, get ready for this about to drop right now...

What do you call a sheep with no legs?

A cloud.


I get it, because the appearance of a sheep without it's legs resembles a cloud. They are both fluffy and white!

Oh mike you comedian, have you considered that part time after your rap job?

No man, rap is me and I am rap.


True dedication to the game.

Anyways Mike, I have got to get off soon and do other things. Do you have any inspirational last words you would like to say?


Live life to the fullest, do your thing, you might get hit by a bus tomorrow. #LLTTFDYTYMGHBABT







#LLTTFDYTYMGHBABT

Truly great words to live by

Guess the Gangster

Written by Ronaldodonut


Congratulations to Ramires who correctly guessed the last gangster,
who turned out to be the one and only Zaki!

This weeks gangster is a handsome chap, guess correctly and win 2 credits:

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Anonymous Killer

Written by Ronaldodonut


A very experienced and exciting player has contact me about a service of his. He will be providing a hit man service for the duration of this round, and he is very good. If you want somebody dead, he is the man to call.


Message BarackObama if you are interested in his services.

D'Obama by Firnari

Written by Ronaldodonut

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Vote Barack Obama for the times

Written by Ronaldodonut

I care about the Gangster Nation times, and I put a lot of time into creating each and every issue. I know that some articles may seem silly and a waste of your time, and I'm sorry if you don't enjoy what I write. But that being said, I know I can do a better job than my competition. I work harder than anyone has ever worked on this newspaper.


But I also know that my reporting of the daily GN events may have been lackluster to many of you, but I'm working hard to find reliable sources and to improve. I am constantly improving, constantly working to see what you guys want to read, constantly striving to make better material.

Please give me a chance to improve and to show you what I can do.

Vote BarackObama for the times. There is no person that cares more.